You Canna Be Well- Mastering Munchie Madness

It’s every stoners worst nightmare. The munchies hit, the fridge and cupboards are empty, and you realize it has been forever, or like an hour, since you ate all of the leftovers. This is a problem that needs to be solved, but taking on the entire grocery store is an even more daunting adventure when high; with so many distractions and temptations and cheap delicious goodness. It’s not difficult to spend an hour in King Soops, spend $48 you don’t have, and pig out an hour later on Oreos, Cheetos, root beer and ice cream drumsticks (some personal favorites). When your head is in the clouds, what ends up in your shopping cart is what sounds good in the moment, and not always things you would typically buy or what is necessarily healthy for you.

For those individuals who fear getting high because of the dreaded munchies, there are a couple things to keep in mind. The first is, munchies don’t have to be unhealthy!! Maybe Hollywood was paid by Pepsi to put all that junk food in the stoner scenes, but cannabis doesn’t make you crave pizza and Funyuns specifically, it just makes you want to eat! So trade out those bags of chips and candy for healthier options, like the ones listed below, and embrace this opportunity to give your body some love in the form of delicious, nutritious treats! Another tip for people who severely suffer from the munchies is to find strains that have THCv in them, as this cannabinoid is known to be an appetite suppressant. One such strain, and one of my favorites, is Durban Poison, available in most dispensaries, and such a great strain to have on hand as it is a wonderful sativa for a pre-workout toke and is a true lifesaver if you suffer from headaches. Again, THCv to the rescue!

Now if you are one of those cannabis users who never has to worry about the munchie monster attacking because you have a fantastic metabolism and gaining weight is impossible and you can eat whatever you want and be fine because you have a highly functioning endocannabinoid system, great! Good for you! These munchie substitutes will help you feel great inside and out as well! Total wellness is about mind, body and spirit, and cannabis, just like diet and nutrition, can be used as a tool to achieve balance of all three. So put good in, get good out and try these snacks instead the next time you find yourself craving some crap.


Typically reach for this…                         Try this instead…

Oreos and other cookies                      Chocolate bark thins

         Cheetos                                      Veggie Sticks (the chip kind)

        Ice Cream                                 Chocolate almond milk, chilled

           Candy              Trail mix, almonds or chickpeas if that’s your thing

Popcorn and chips       Fruits and veggies (grapes, carrots, apple slices, etc)

 Anything chocolate!!!!    Dark chocolate options are best, like granola bars


Now we still haven’t solved our predicament of getting wildly off task and distracted once we get to the store, so my advice is, make a list. And don’t lose the list before you get to the store because then you’re back to square one. Stick to your list, don’t go up and down each aisle, (even though there are the so many cool new variations of Cheeze-its and there are so many pretty colors in the cereal aisle), and stay along the outer edges of the store, as that is where healthier and fresher options, like fruits, meats and baked goods are located. Although, look out for the bakery, because once you enter that department, you are not coming out empty handed. So that’s it, that’s my advice for surviving a trip to the grocery store if you are high as a kite. Make a list, stay out of all of the aisles, and remember, healthy foods make the body and mind happy. After all, life is better when you are happy and high. 🙂


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