You Canna Be Happy presents A Broke Girls Guide to Buying Weed

 

Times are tough. When bills are due, your gas light is on, the fridge is empty and life is reminding you at every turn how broke you are, there is nothing more you need than a good toke. But wait! Shit! Something you never thought would happen to you in this great state of Colorado has occurred. You’re out of weed. And broke AF.  And you have 4 days and $50 til pay day. What’s a girl to do? Go without weed and spend that money on food and gas? Ha, no, that would be too responsible. Time to use your sixth grade math skills and make a budget. There is definitely a way that lil bit of cash can be stretched to ensure you survive the next few days. All you have to do is know how to shop smart at the dispensary! Follow these simple rules the next time you go to buy your ganja and I guarantee you’ll still have $10 to put in your gas tank!

  1. Everyone has some kind of discount day. Munchie Monday, Topical Tuesday, Wax Wednesday, Thirsty Thursday, Free gram/joint Friday, Shatterday are common deal days at many dispensaries. Next time you stop into the pot shop, ask what their daily specials are, typically they’ll even have a little flyer that states this info. Take one and put it on your fridge! That way, next time you need a bottle of canna-lotion, you can remind yourself to wait until a topical discount day, which will typically save you up to 25% off all lotions, oils and patches! Worth the wait to save some dough.
  2. Believe it or not, weed coupons exist! Check such publications as Rooster, Culture and CannaPages for coups that’ll get you $15 eighths, $100 ozs, buy 2 get 1 free concentrates to name a few of the sick deals you can take advantage of. Just remember to have that coupon in hand, often times they will ask for it, and sometimes all the good coups are ripped out of the mags at the shop, so come prepared.
  3. Show some love to your favorite dispensary and they’ll reward you! Refer a friend, write a review on Weedmaps, tag them or give them a shout out on your pages of social media, anything to drive business their way. They greatly appreciate it and will typically show their appreciation with a pre roll or something.
  4. If you are able to and you have a valid medical condition, such as pain or insomnia, strongly consider getting a medical card. If this is truly medicine for you, whether it be for pain or sleep or stress or depression or focus or whatever is, it should not have to cost you an arm and a leg and 2 weeks’ worth of groceries. When I found out how much my favorite 100mg chocolate bars were on the rec side I was appalled! I could and would never pay over $30 for 100mg! Now THAT is price gouging. Having a red or purple card will save you so much money on everything from edibles (including higher doses), concentrates, flower, capsules and topicals So, do a little research and see if you qualify for a medical marijuana card in your state and make an appointment with a MMJ doctor today!
  5. Ask if any products are expiring soon! This will typically get you 20-30% off such products as cookies, truffles, brownies and other baked goods due to a limited shelf life. They’d rather sell it at a discount than throw it away after it so calls “expires” and as long as they remain refrigerated, you can usually get a couple days out of them. But still eat them right along, waste not!
  6. See if they have a discount or clearance bin. There can be anything from shake eighths n grams in here to lotions and edibles that aren’t selling well or they have excess of. It’s always worth sifting through, there can be some real treasures in there!
  7. Buying bulk will save you money in the long run if you can afford it. Although $100-$200 can be a lot to front, consider asking a couple friends if they’d be interested in splitting a half or whole ounce with you. Their answer will probably be yes, especially if you tell them you can get a $100 oz and do $25 for a quarter. Unless you are growing your own, that is going to be a hard deal to beat.
  8. Have a budget. Make a commitment to yourself that you will not spend any more than X on an eighth, an ounce or 100 mg edible.  For me personally, that’s $35, $150 and $10 respectively. And trust me, there’s plenty of good weed and tasty, quality edibles for those prices, you just have to know how to shop smart.

There you have it, 8 simple guidelines to consider the next time you need to replenish your stash when your bank account is low. Set a budget, ask your budtenders about deals and specials and get rewarded for leaving reviews and finding coups. The more you practice bargain shopping, the better you get at it. With any luck, you’ll have sufficient weed to get you through the holidaze and just enough money to buy a couple Christmas presents. But don’t go crazy with that, remember, the best gifts are handmade and come from the heart, not the department store. (That’s what I’ve been telling family and friends for years 😉 And besides, chill pills, medicated chocolate and nugs are what everyone really wants to see under the tree Christmas morning. Happy shopping!

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s